They sold us 365. Today is the other day.

Email is thinking about it. The meeting cancelled itself. The status page says everything is fine. Welcome to day 364, the one that was never in the brochure.

Current status: not responding

I'll make $1,000,000 before Microsoft makes it back online.

Donate. It's only $1. That's less than 365.

BitcoinBitcoin network

bc1qmwqnnrgkrfv7nsx2km7ylau06v5ee3lca5ajka

USDTTRON network (TRC-20)

TFJScWjBNETi4tYLni1Vndt3oiGjF5hSK5

SolanaSolana network

9o9b4GnxZ831GZbXbdbFDhxsMQ43inRZa2npTPxcmz1f

EthereumEthereum network

0x3a7BE4f215549Ff7497CE9D0F21287E3b0e0B5bD

Send only on the network named on each card. Anything sent on a different network is lost for good.

This is a joke bet, not an investment and not a charity. Donations go to the person who made this site, and you get nothing back except the satisfaction of being right.

Live numbers, entirely made up

No real monitoring happens here. That is the one thing we have in common with the status page.

0seconds since someone asked "is it just me?"

48,211tickets opened while you read this

0emails delivered on the first try

Official statement generator

Need an update for your boss? Press the button. It sounds exactly as informative as the real thing.

Incident updateWe are aware of an issue affecting a subset of users (all of them). Root cause: a configuration change. It is always a configuration change.

Is it back yet?

A thorough, scientific check. Results guaranteed to arrive shortly.

Nothing checked yet. Ignorance is uptime.

Outage bingo

Tap what you have already seen today. Four in a row and you are morally allowed to go home.

The meme wall

Three posters for the group chat. Screenshot one and send it to the person who said "it works for me".

Loading99%

It has been 99% for a while.

Help deskIs it just me?

No. It never is.

SouvenirI survived day 364

and all I got was this screenshot.